dontgiveafock | [ 002 ] [ Commentlog ]

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[He'd been there for hours, back torn open from the flogging received and body a mass of agony. Joe was aware that he wasn't the worst dealt that day, but it didn't mean his pain wasn't still on the extreme. He knew he should probably sleep, that the coming days would be busy, but for the moment, the man was content to stare blankly at the ground before him.

Guilt, was what he felt the most. For Sollux, and for Nel. The woman he wanted to scream at for being so foolish, for throwing her life away when he knew there was nothing she could do. Joe had witnessed and been part of enough trials to know that there was no passing the Headsman.]

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[Joe looks up at the sound of Isabella's approach, lines darker than usual under his eyes. It's safe to say that Joe looks like crap. He does smile at the sight of her though, feigning once more that nothing is the matter.]

Hullo, Isabella.

[She tries hard not to focus on his back. Or the blood. She tries to look at Joe's face and she sees that smile there and inside something breaks a little.

She tries to smile at you, Joe, because you are smiling at her, but it is forced. Lacking the life it usually has.]

I brought some bread, it's-

[She takes a breath.]

It's not much. And a blanket.

Yer a sweet thing, lass.

[He means every word. Her smile damn near breaks his heart.]

Hey now, chin up, alright? M'gonna be fine an' so are the others.

[Isabella looks at Joe and nods fiercely. She is trying to hide the fact that her eyes were watering. She wasn't going to cry! With a quick swipe of her sleeve she dashes the tears away.

He was smiling. What right did she have to cry in front of him?]

Here.

[She gets on her knees alongside of him, and folds the blanket up so that it makes a thick cushion.]

I... I don't think it will be a good idea. On your back. But, help your knees, m-maybe.

[Good plan. Joe nods an approval, but looks to Alex.]

Appreciate it, Isa, but I reckon Alex over there might need it more than me.

[Once Alex is taken care of, Joe will accept aid for himself.]

The lad had a pretty rough time. M'legs are tougher, I think.

[Isabella looks at Alex and then back at Joe again. Her emotions are roiling again. Churned up into a muddy mess. She was attending Joe first, because what little courage for confrontation she had, she was trying to build.

But that wasn't fair. To Joe, to Alex.]

You're right.

[She stands and gives Joe a plaintive look. She hasn't seen Alex since before she found out that it was him that was responsible for the attack. They haven't spoken for a long while, since that day where they were making dresses together.

This was going to be hard.

Isabella walks toward Alex with nervous steps. A few puffs of down following her.]

[Alex has been healed, Anders having stopped by a few hours ago to see to his wounds. He had not expected the mage to do such, nor even remotely hoped that it would work as well as it had. His back was free of wounds, and even the scars were gone from his previous injuries. he only wounds remaining, that would remain for a good while yet, were those around his neck and wrists from the silver that inlaid the stocks.

He had heard the gentle conversation two sets of stocks down and he was dreading what was coming. His stomach rolled as the angel made her way toward him, her form exuding fear and tension that rolled off her and played across his nostrils.

The fact that she feared him now made him ill and brought the guilt to him all the more. He considered this girl a friend and he'd done her grievous harm on the full moon. He could not imagine that she would ever really forgive him his actions and he couldn't blame her.

When the footsteps pause, her scent drifts across him and he knows she's standing in front of his stocks now.]

'Bella .. [His voice breaks and he swallows thickly around the roll of bile that rises in his throat.] I'm sorry .. I'm so, so sorry .. [He rolls his blue-green eyes up at her, brows knitted together sharply.] I should .. I should have warned you .. It never should have happened .. I'm so sorry ..

[His voice catches on the last and he looks down at the ground, his dirty hair falling across his face. it had long since fallen loose from its braid, now covered with sweat and blood and sticking to his skin and wounds here and there.]

Next time we'll be better prepared, Alex. All of us.

[Joe turns his head as best he can to look at the pair.]

You let us know when it's comin' up, an' we'll find a way to keep the lot of ye safe.

[His words are weary but firm. There is nothing to suggest Joe isn't completely serious in his words. Where Alex has been healed, Joe has not. It doesn't bother him anymore. Joe has had time to adjust to the lack of trust in him from some simply because he is staff. It's not something he can blame them for.]

I promise.

[Isabella doesn't say anything at first. Her throat is choked up and the smell of burnt flesh sickens her to no end. Her memory is juxaposed with two images of Alex: the carefree and kind to'mo he was when he was sewing, and this Alex, beaten, bloody and defeated. She can not look him in the face when he pleads with her, but she drops to her knees beside him with the folded blanket.

She turns her head to Joe, listening as he speaks. Then turns to stare at the ground in front of her. She is quiet.

When she does speak, it is soft and barely above a whisper.]

Alex, I-

[She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath, bracing herself to say the words she said earlier, again. Just for his ears.]

I forgive you. For what you did to me.

[She bites her lip and her fists clench. The bard shakes from the overwhelming and contrasting emotions.]

I was raised with ... with weres.... I know about it. What happens.... but I just... Without Sollux there, you would have killed me... he got hurt...

[She'll make a move to put the makeshift cushion under his knees.She's likely going to be sick later with how torn she is. There's something else she has to say but she can't get out past the fist in her throat. ]

[Alex flits his pained gaze toward Joe as the cook speaks. He hadn't expected this sort of a reaction to any of this. He hadn't expected anyone to speak up for him or offer him help, now that the effect of his change was known. Bryn, Anders .. Joe .. Kevas, in a weird 'I'll kill you if I must' kind of way.

There is a burn behind his lids that he blinks away quickly and he swallows around the thickness in his throat.]

Thanks, Joe .. You don- .. thanks.

[Unlike others, Alex has absolutely no problem with Joe, nor any lack of faith in him. Joe has been nothing but good to him and now would certainly not be the time to lie or try to get something. No, Joe, you're cool with Alex. Then Isabella is speaking and Alex turns his blue-green gaze to her once more. Her voice is soft and full of pain and the guilt just comes back full force as she says that she forgives him.]

Isabella I'm sorry .. what I am is no excuse .. I should have warned all of you so you'd have been prepared. All of this could have been avoided .. It's my fault that this happened ..

[All his fault, really .. and if what Sollux said about the moon is right, then maybe it always has been. He's pulled from his thoughts as she moves to position the blanket under his knees and with a bit of adjusting and a refusal to make a single sound of pain, his knees are resting on the soft material.

She smells so afraid .. and the knowledge that he's done this to her makes Alex absolutely sick with guilt. However, searching her face, he can see there is more.]

'bella .. talk to me ..

[He looks up at her and his gaze holds no blame or expectations. Whatever she wants or NEEDS to say he will listen to and he will take.]

[Isabella shakes her head no. Those words would be cruel when even now, Isabella feels that being here next to Alex is itself a cruelty. For both of them. She is frightened and he keeps apologizing....]

Alex, I spoke the truth to the Headsman. I forgive you for what you did to me... if ... I could- ... I tried to ... I did not want you punished on my behalf.

[She breaks the bread she has in her hands. The black shirt is over one arm, and serves as a reminder why she was so torn over forgiveness and loyalty. ]

I have some bread... for you.

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